I can't actually believe this is happening again... today, I had my first panic attack in  I couldn't even tell you how long. The worst part is.. I have absolutely no one to talk about it... I just can't bring myself to tell anyone. I can't remember the last time any of my close friends.. actually asked me how I was. Not that I even want to talk about myself.. I hate when people just talk about themselves to me.. so the hell would I do it to someone else. I keep getting pissed of at the stupidest shit. But that same stupid shit... are the things that are dragging me down again. It sucks now.. I feel so alone again.. for no reason. I constantly feel like the tag along friend whenever I go anywhere. So much shit has gotten screwed up this year and I constantly feel like I'm in the middle of everything. I've lost respect for so many people this year... well no I shouldn't say that.. I'm disappointed in a lot of people this year. I can even go as far as saying I'm disappointed in myself for a couple things. I don't know what I'm gonna do. I'm hurt so bad right now for reasons I don't even know. I seriously have no idea what I'm gonna do this time. I slipping farther and father into the another dark point in my life and right now I don't have anyone to save me. I feel like just completely giving up on everything. I can't go through this shit again. It's going to hurt me so bad.. and I've been doing so good for such a long time.